Hello Shalom2,
You mention a number of disorders with which I assume you have been diagnosed by a doctor or doctors. If you have not been diagnosed with those you mention, then you need to see a doctor for a proper evaluation and treatment. I recognize the difficulty that if you are in the U.S. you may not have funding for the latter. As to the questions you raise at the beginning of your post, I believe you will be in a better position to recognize the answers yourself if your wellbeing is addressed first.
I am not a doctor, but then the following based in nutritional medicine, is not a part of medical training. I am also not a nutritional therapist, but have made it my interest.
Please consider the following:
The brain has no pain receptors so when it is suffering, the mind perceives this by feelings of depression, anger, frustration. If you remove the (often chemical-imbalance) cause of this, you would instead encounter significant improvement.
The brain often shows these symptoms due normally to external psychological stresses placed upon a person by our modern stressful living, whereby a setback such as for example, being let down by a someone we love, can seem like the “last straw”. It can also occur when or in addition to the body being attacked by a pathogen with which the immune system is not coping; an unmanaged-pathogen can produce increasing-amounts of toxin.
The brain manifests such symptoms while in the circumstance of it lacking sufficient resources to cope. The following circumstances are typically required to produce those symptoms:
i) External stress factor,
ii) the possible presence of a unmanaged-pathogen,
iii) lack of sufficient resources aka malnutrition; in other words, absence of a balanced healthy diet; this both reduces the ability of the immune system to cope with infection, and also denies the brain the resources it needs to cope.
If you will consider giving your brain all the nutritional support it needs, you will feel significantly better, provided you maintain for a few weeks a balanced healthy diet (see further below) to experience such improvement.
I know that right now this may sound unlikely, but try it and you will see significant improvement.
Ensure you have a normal balanced healthy diet, so that your body and more specifically here the brain, gets all the levels of vital nutrients it needs for coping with any stresses in your life.
Consider taking a look at the following web page:
https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/eat-well/
In addition I would recommend wholemeal bread (none of the fiber removed). You can tell if it is genuine wholemeal because it weighs more than usual bread and you will find that the loaf cannot be squeezed easily.
I would also suggest a portion of (plain unsugared/unsalted) almonds on a regular basis. Almonds contain a wide range of amino acids which your body needs. You can chop the almonds up and add them to plain LIVE yogurt. "Live" means that it contains friendly bacteria, that will produce important vitamins for you in the gut, while also protecting you against harmful bacteria and yeasts. Try to avoid yogurt that has had sugar added to it. You can flavor plain yogurt with fruit, maybe honey; anything you fancy - but add these things yourself choosing natural ingredients.
Try to avoid eating anything that can cause "brain irritation". These are usually non-natural substances which take the form of artificial colorings.
Start to look at the ingredients for the things you eat.
Please consider going to your local health food shop and purchasing an amino acid called L-Tyrosine.
To be effective, this must be taken on an empty stomach (so right after you get up in the morning is good) with plenty of water (one or two glasses),
and then you need to leave one hour before eating or drinking (although you can take more water if you wish).
Dosage is Two of the 500 mg capsules, once a day.
(As with handling any supplements or medication, ensure you wash your hands with soap, before handling them.)
You should be able to take this in addition to any other medication but you can check this out with your doctor. Bear in mind that doctors are not trained in nutritional medicine, and so expect them to be rather skeptical about supplements.
Vitamin C (with Bioflavonoids required so the vitamin C can be properly absorbed) not only supports the immune system but can also help the brain cope with stress. I would suggest you get this in supplement form from a health food shop, as the amount that you need for treatment is more than you would be able to obtain from food. The dosage should be not less than 500 mg tablets. Try one 500 mg tablet three times a day with a meal, but you can increase the dosage if needed.
As soon as you see improvement, I would suggest you seek out a Jewish Bible class starting with Scripture, and the Jewish festivals. It is just my view, but I hope the Jewish Bible classes you locate will be those of Orthodox Judaism.
I hope this helps and that you find happiness both in your general life and within Judaism.
Robert.